SpongeBob SquarePants Movie

Sending gamers down a linear path, SpongeBob takes the form of the original Crash Bandicoot games.  The stages aren't extremely long (some can be beaten in a couple of minutes.  Others may take a bit longer), nor is the difficulty extremely challenging.  This game goes for the "all ages" market by being quite a bit easier and a lot more straightforward than its predecessor.  (Not that Battle For Bikini Bottom was all that difficult -- it too was a pretty easy game.)  This is good news for the youngster in your family who was previously too young to get the most out of the game.  It's bad news for everyone else. 

Note: Everyone else constitutes most of SpongeBob's viewers.  The majority of its viewers are over the age of 10.  Most kids beat their first game by the age of 8.  Many have conquered Sonic, Mario and Crash Bandicoot at the young age of 6.

If you didn't play the last game, you missed out big time.  The controls were tight for each of the characters, two of which (SpongeBob and Patrick) have returned for the movie game.  Controlling SpongeBob in this game is equally rewarding.  Patrick's stretchy tongue makes him the ideal character for swinging across dangerous objects, like a big tub of scalding hot goo.  Both characters can ride in SpongeBob's brand-new hamburger mobile.  Although it's made of a tasty, sesame seed bun, includes the finest ground beef, and has pickles for wheels, I suggest you don't relish in the experience too much.  The roads are quite busy these days.  Crash too harshly and you could wind up splattering faster than ketchup shoots out of a bottle after being stepped on.

The hamburger mobile makes more game appearances than expected.  Several stages are dedicated to it, asking the player to complete various tasks while driving this strangely appealing vehicle.  Cruising through the stage is relatively easy.  The other tasks are easy as well, but can cause a tiny bit of frustration, just enough to make you sigh (or scream) once or twice.  Besides getting from point A to point B (a video game staple), the hamburger mobile is good for driving through rings, collecting items in a hurry, and for driving down dark paths that might house dangerous monsters.  Oh no, not him!  He's got boxer-removing abilities!

SpongeBob follows in the footsteps of every other game on the planet by including a point-based attribute upgrade system (try saying that five times fast).  Thousands of "manliness" points are needed to unlock new "macho" moves.  Manliness points are obtained in the most obvious way: by collecting every item you can get your hands on.  You do that by destroying crates, enemies, and other objects that can be destroyed.  It's not hard to figure out, not in the least bit.  Most items reward SpongeBob or Patrick with multiple points, making it easier to gain manliness points than it may have first appeared.

The cut scenes are more like storyboards than movie sequences.  You don't get to see too many clips from the film, just stills taken from specific scenes.  Why would they do this when all other movie-based games use real-time sequences, if not actual clips from the film?  No one will ever be able to figure out these things.  It's just something the game industry does.  They don't follow any of the so-called rules.

This could come as a disappointment to players expecting to re-live the movie's magic through a game.  During the gameplay you'll be entertained by amusing dialogue, but the still picture movie sequences are a bore.   

To add or not to add to your Christmas list, that is the question.  The answer is yes to those who love all-things SpongeBob.  That might not seem like a shocking conclusion, but keep in mind that the last game came highly recommended whether you liked the show or not.  It actually made me a bigger SpongeBob fan.  The levels were bigger and the missions weren't so linear.

Gameplay: 6.9
Mixed fun that’s not for everyone.  Levels are linear and lack the challenge of its close competitors (Crash, Spyro, Crash might not be the best example considering how easy the last game was, though it is harder than SpongeBob.

Graphics: 6.5
We’re near the end of the current console generation.  SpongeBob looks great on the big screen – surely he could have looked stellar with cel-shading graphics on Xbox.  The developers opted not to use cel-shading though (in fear of being looked as another crappy game with cel-shaded graphics I suppose).  SpongeBob and friends are modeled well, but all in all this is not a spectacular-looking game, certainly not when compared to what (yep, I’m going to say it) the Xbox is capable of.  Maybe if I keep saying it game publishers will hear me.  Maybe…

Sound: 7
Comedic dialogue that doesn’t occur frequently enough.  The voiced storyboards are too still to be funny.  Musically the game sounds like  happy-go-lucky adventure.  It fits the mood of the game, but I still don’t enjoy listening to it.

Difficulty: Easy
Akin to eating an entire Pumpkin Pie in one sitting.  It might seem like a challenge, but you know you can do it.

Concept: 6
Familiar gameplay + the story of spongy movie.  It’s not the first time a game does little to take the film experience to a whole new level, nor will it be the last.

Overall: 6.9
Kids (young kids) will like this game except for the frustration.  The vehicle controls aren’t very accurate, causing a lot of unnecessary screw ups during that part of the game.  Other than that it’s a piewalk.  (I’d say cakewalk, but that’s so 1990.)  Most experienced players, even those as young as 10, will be at least a little disappointed by the linearity of the game.  If the movie sequences were more than storyboards I could have easily recommended it to SpongeBob fans of all ages as a must-rent.  Maybe next time.