There are lots of things out there in this crazy world of ours that don’t take themselves seriously such as prop comic Carrot Top, reality shows like Average Joe or The Simple Life, and Michael Jackson’s cosmetic surgeon.  Few of these, however, really manage to entertain us beyond the initial shock value (except for Michael Jackson’s cosmetic surgeon – his work is downright hilarious).  The same is true in the video game industry.  Many developers have taken a shot at the humorous gross-out angle to sway the young demographic towards the market shelves with little success.  Planet Moon Studios’ games are a rare exception.  Last year’s surprising hit Giants: Citizen Kabuto for the PC showed just how twisted (and ingenious) these guys are.  Their latest game and only second title, Armed and Dangerous, shows they haven’t lost their taste for the absurd and their skill for clever writing and game craftsmanship. 

Just by looking at the cast of characters, gamers should know what they are getting themselves into.  The wily foursome includes Roman, a British wise guy and the only character who comes close to any normalcy in the game, Jonesy, a Scottish mole who lives for blowing things up, Q, a ‘proper’ Robot who became self-aware over a cup of tea, and Rexus, a blind psychic who can foresee all except a trip to the shower.  Together they make up the Lionhearts, the only resistance to King Forge, the ruler of the land and the keeper of the powerful Book of Rule.  If the King manages to open the Book of Rule (which masquerades as a Basket Weaving book), lots of bad things will happen to lots of good people.  As King Forge holds his tyrannical grip over the people of Milola, the Lionhearts seek to take the Book of Rule by force… lots and lots of force. 

In Armed & Dangerous, players take the role of Roman through 21 levels of shootin’ and high tootin’ in a semi-fantasy land created from the minds of the deranged.  Much of the action takes place in third-person combat as Roman and his chronies blast through baddie after baddie.  There isn’t a whole lot of depth to the gameplay, and gamers looking for complex strategy and Big Blue-like AI won’t find it here.  What Armed and Dangerous does have to offer is constant action, knee-slappin’ humor, and a storyline worth playing the game for, a rarity in these times.

The gameplay is simple, but that’s not to say it isn’t difficult.  Quite the contrary, in fact.  Many of the levels will leave a few gamers frustrated at their seemingly impossible solutions, and that’s only on Normal difficulty.  It won’t do to run blindly in guns a-blazin’ (though it works sometimes) and some careful thinking is involved, not to figure out a secret path or take out key enemies, but to figure out just how exactly you go in guns a-blazin’ effectively.  Q and Jonesy accompany Roman on many of the missions, with the computer taking over their dim-witted AI.  They’re better for delivering a little extra damage and taking a few bullets than any tactical mumbo jumbo, but through clever storytelling you’ll grow attached to them and want to keep their hides alive, even though they reanimate themselves after every level thanks to the magic of video games.      

The controls are quite simple and ensure that even people with two left thumbs can play the game.  First-person mode is easily activated with the left trigger, and really helps give the onslaught of enemies a dose of hot lead (or hot shark – I’ll explain later…).  The white and black buttons are used to tell Jonesy and Q to defend an area or return to Roman’s aid, but there are few times in the game that it’s necessary.  A&D is pick-up-and-play personified.

Most missions are objective-based and very linear, asking gamers to go from point A to point B, get this item from this place, or blow up some key structures.  A little variety in the game keeps Armed and Dangerous a little spicy, with some missions asking Roman and crew to defend villages, rescue hapless villagers, and even fly with a jetpack.  There’s even a mission that pits Roman on a wall-mounted machine-gun/cannon blowing away wave after wave of bad guys attempting to storm a fortress… it’s absolutely a joy to help hundreds of enemies meet their maker and satisfies the blood thirst of even the most parched. 

The real joy of the game that keeps tired gamers plunging forward through the missions in Armed and Dangerous are the well-written and highly entertaining cutscenes.  Though graphically subpar, the jokes are fast and furious and have a running time of about 30 minutes.  Codes can be found on the internet to watch them all in sequence, and they prove to hold up on their own as my non-gaming roommate can tell you.  The voice acting is fantastic, the story is involving, and the payoff is worth it. 

The ‘Dangerous’ part will ultimately depend on the gamer, but the ‘Armed’ portion is definitely wrapped in nice paper with a pretty little bow.  The arsenal in A&D is sensational.  Though the bulk of the game will be played with Roman’s monstrous gatling gun, there are plenty of other weapons that really make the game original.  Sure there’s a personal mortar cannon that lobs explosives like a twisted tennis ball machine.  Sure there’s a sniper rifle that can shoot a pea from 200 yards away.  Sure there’s a gun that shoots land sharks that swim under the ground and eat your enemies.  Yep, you heard me right.  And after it eats one enemy, it swims around looking for more.  There’s also vindaloo homing rockets that spice up more than baddies’ mouths, sticky homing grenades that fly like Frisbees, and a topsy-turvy bomb that turns the world upside down, literally, sending anything that’s not screwed into the ground falling down into the sky before hurtling them back to Earth at the mercy of gravity.  One of the more satisfying elements of the game comes when hurling a grenade successfully at an enemy from long distance.  The body will explode high into the air and land just behind Roman with a thud.  Blowing stuff up never felt so good.

The graphics aren’t mind-blowing, particularly on standard televisions.  The HDTV support brings out the richness of the textures, but standard TV owners will probably be a little disappointed.  The game does do a great job of distance perspective as most of the levels are wide and open.  It would have been nice to see a little more variety in explosions, particularly when buildings blow up, but instead they merely blow up in the same large chunks they always do.  Several of the enemies do look fantastic, especially the larger robotic juggernauts who aggressively amble towards Roman and crew.  All in all, the look of the game gets a resounding ‘S’ for satisfactory.

What was said about the graphics can also be said about the sound.  There’s nothing ground-breaking here, just some rattling of guns, booms from explosions, and the occasional funny quip from the gang.  Some great music comes in seemingly at random points, filled with percussion and bagpipe sounds of the Scottish highlands.  Once again, there aren’t too many positives or negatives in this department.

Armed and Dangerous is an altogether solid game from an up and coming developer.  It’s obvious that the people of Planet Moon have spent as much time watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail as they have playing video games, and their take on games is refreshing and novel.  These guys will soon have enough money to make some real classics with gorgeous graphics and awesome sound as soon as people take notice.  Until then, their fans are going to have to play their entertaining games for the simple (yet fun) gameplay and deranged writing.  

Armed and Dangerous is rated T for Teen with elements of mild language, violence, and crude humor, but it’s nothing you worse than what you’d find in an episode of Ren and Stimpy. 

Gameplay: 8.5

Armed and Dangerous is a simple game… shoot a lot of things, rescue some stuff, and have a blast doing it.  There should be about twenty hours of entertaining gameplay that’s perfect for rainy days or long weekends.   

Graphics: 7.5

The graphics may not impress, but they won’t disappoint either.  A&D supports 480i for those of you with fancy televisions, and it really helps the look of the game.

Sound: 7.0

A bit of a disappointment, but the only real need for sound is to hear the voice acting in the cutscenes. 

Difficulty: Hard

The game is tough.  Not quite in that ‘hard to figure out’ way, but more in that ‘a man and his gun versus fifty people’ kind of way.   

Concept: 8.0

The actual game may have nothing to offer conceptually, but the idea of a video game as pure entertainment is something that the industry lacks and Planet Moon prides itself in. 

Overall: 8.0

Armed and Dangerous is flat-out fun.  The gameplay is simple, yet addictive.  It may not satisfy the super-serious gamer who is into tactical combat and government conspiracies, but most will appreciate the sense of humor that is part Shrek, part Monty Python, and makes fun of everything from Star Wars to Jonesy’s manhood.  Probably more of a rental than a purchase, but if Armed and Dangerous is a sign of things to come from Blue Moon, they should hit the big time real soon.